The Seven Sins of Harry Potter
by thekecmaster
Summary: Harry Potter stumbles upon an ancient artifact and is suddenly split into seven different characters. Each character represents a deadly sin. Chaos now reigns at Hogwarts.
1. Enter the Sins

(A/N) Flametongue: Now, this fic will be full of short-time pairings, reason; there is a Harry character named 'Lust'. If you don't know anything about the seven deadly sins, you might have some problem in understanding this fic. Anyway, it is humor, all the way to the end, and then it'll be a Harry x Luna fluff in the last chap.

(A/N) thekecmaster: First four chapters by Flametongue, the rest to be provided by me. I only tried to correct minor spelling errors in the first 4 chapters. Oh yeah, I don't own Harry Potter.

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The Seven Sins of Harry Potter

Chapter 01 – Enter the Sins

Harry Potter was walking silently along the corridors of Hogwarts. It was past curfew, but he didn't really care. Ron and Hermione had been up to another one of their bickering sessions in the common room, and Harry got tired of them and left. Neither of them had seemed to notice.

He came to a stop as he was about to pass a strange-looking statue etched into the wall; he stared at it curiously. It was seven people standing on top and around some kind of hill; at the bottom there was a fat man eating what seemed to be a pile of food, next to him sat a man wearing a sly smile as his hands were clutching a treasure-chest filled with gold. An inch or two away from them stood an angry looking man; he gritted his teeth as he held an axe high in the air, ready to strike. In front of him lay a man who looked extremely bored, he looked as if he didn't care if the man behind him would strike at him or not. Higher up on the rock lay a naked woman, smiling seductively. Another woman was standing a bit above her; she was glaring enviously at a man standing on the top with his hands on his hips, and a triumphant smile on his face.

"Harry Potter sir?"

Harry quickly tore his eyes away from the statue and looked around for the source of the voice. He looked down; Dobby the house-elf was standing next to him, looking at Harry curiously. Harry smiled slightly.

"Hello Dobby." He said.

Dobby smiled. "Isn't Harry Potter supposed to be in Gryffindor tower by now?" He asked. "Isn't it past curfew?"

Harry looked a little guilty, but then he chuckled. "Well, with Ron and Hermione bickering like there was no tomorrow, it's not really enjoyable being around them, that's all."

Dobby nodded. "Dobby saw Mr. Filch a moment ago," He said. "Dobby doesn't think he is headed this way, but Harry Potter should be careful."

Harry smiled. "I don't think I'll have to worry about Filch," He pulled out an old parchment from his pocket. "With this I can find out where he is and what he's doing."

Dobby looked at the parchment curiously, and then he looked at Harry hesitantly. "May Dobby ask how?"

Harry grinned. "Sure you can." He unrolled the parchment and tapped it with his wand saying "I solemnly swear I am up to no good." Suddenly ink started spreading from where Harry had tapped the parchment and started painting the parchment with the corridors of Hogwarts; the Marauders' map.

Harry crouched down and showed Dobby the map. "See these little dots?" Dobby nodded. "They represent all the people who are currently inside Hogwarts. You can see that Filch is in his office." He pointed at the place of the map the two of them where currently in. "And these two dots are us."

Dobby nodded, but suddenly he squinted his eyes and looked at the map. "Harry Potter has a bubble above his spot."

Harry looked at the map curiously. Sure enough, the dot with his name on it had a bubble above it. He looked closer and saw the word 'arasiloc' written in it.

"Arasiloc?" He read curiously.

Suddenly the statue he had inspected earlier gave a lurch and began moving further into the wall, as if something was pushing it into it.

Harry stood up quickly, wand ready. Dobby startled at the sound of the moving statue.

When it stopped moving, Harry and Dobby saw a small circular aisle pushing itself upwards from a hole in the floor where the statue had stood; a small orb lay peacefully on it, giving away a faint glow of blue.

"What is that?" Dobby asked cautiously, glancing up at Harry who lowered his wand.

"I don't know." He walked slowly towards the small altar; his eyes locked at the small blue sphere. Without thinking, he reached out and took the orb in his hand. It suddenly started to glow brighter. Startled, he tried to let go of it, but his hands were glued to it.

Dobby yelped as the blue light engulfed Harry, giving of a ringing sound. He closed his eyes in fear and put his hands over them. When the ringing stopped he opened his eyes cautiously, and what he saw made his tennis-ball eyes grow wide as quaffles. In front of him stood not only an unharmed Harry Potter, but seven unharmed Harry Potters.

"Well…" Said one of them as he examined his hands. "That's interesting."

Another one of them suddenly looked furious; he clenched his teeth and balled up his hands into fists. "Who the hell put that orb thing there?" He shouted. "Oh I bet it was Malfoy!" He hit his fist against the wall. "That bastard is up for some serious hurt; oh he's seen it coming at him for years!"

"I doubt it was Malfoy," Said another Harry as he stared at the statue that now moved back into its original position; a bored expression on his face. "But I don't care; go ahead Wrath beat him up."

"Let's not get too hasty," Said another Harry with a glint in his eyes and a sly smile on his face. He put his hand on Wrath's shoulder. "We have to put up with a plan, think about what we can do with his possessions!"

"As long as I get to beat up some Slytherins!" Wrath said as his eyes gave of a glow of fire.

"Oh, and Wrath, take this." Said another Harry as he quickly scribbled down a bunch of names on a note and handed it to Wrath who stared at it before exclaiming "Who the –beep- are these, Lust?"

Lust grinned. "The boyfriends of the most beautiful chicks at Hogwarts of course, could you 'take care' of them for me?"

Wrath rolled his eyes and stuffed the note into his pocket. "Whatever!"

"Why can't I beat someone up?" Asked another one and turned to Lust. "Why is it always Wrath who gets to beat someone up?"

Another Harry put an arm around him and sighed. "Envy, you simply need to learn how to decide things for yourself," He smiled. "Like me."

"I'm hungry," said another.

"You're always hungry, Gluttony!" Wrath exclaimed.

"Pride, do you have any food?" Gluttony asked.

The Harry who had told Envy to be more like him stood straight, a pompous smile on his face. "No, but naturally I know where you could get some."

Gluttony looked very excited. "Where?"

Pride rolled his eyes. "The kitchen of course!"

Gluttony mouthed an 'oh' before hurrying off towards the kitchen.

Lust snorted. "Gluttony definitely need to get out more, wouldn't you agree Sloth?"

The one who had eyed the statue earlier slowly looked up, looking extremely bored. "Does it look like I care?" He asked.

Lust raised his eyebrows, but then he shrugged and turned towards Wrath and the last unnamed Harry. "Hey, Greed!" He said. "If any of the Slytherins Wrath beats up have any condoms; please, do let me know."

Greed grinned slyly. "Well, you'll have to pay for the information," He said. "And you'll have to pay if you want any condoms."

Lust rolled his eyes. "Fine, I'll just do it without rubber." He said. "It's much more comfortable anyway."

Greed quickly said "I'll give you a big discount!"

"Whatever," Lust chuckled. "I'm just gonna go check the common room, maybe Lavender's still up." He mused and walked away.

"Now, let's go beat up Malfoy!" Wrath urged.

"Patience, my friend." Greed said. "How do you expect us to get into his common room huh? Let's sleep on matters; we can make up plans in the Room of Requirement."

Wrath scowled. "Fine! But tomorrow…!"

"Tomorrow." Greed nodded as he led Wrath in the direction of the Room of Requirement.

Envy muttered something about life being 'so unfair' before walking off in the opposite direction.

Pride sighed. "It's not easy not being me." He said before following Envy.

Sloth stared at Pride before shaking his head muttering "Whatever." He conjured a pillow and sat down and leaned his head on the pillow against the wall.

Dobby stared helplessly as all the Harry's except Sloth walked off in different directions. He spotted the orb lying on the floor, it was now faint black. Dobby hesitated before carefully picking up the black sphere, he sighed in relief when nothing happened. He looked over at the now slightly snoring Sloth Harry as he lay there lazily.

Dobby let his head drop. "Whatever should Dobby do?" He asked himself.

* * *

Ron awoke grumpily on Sunday morning; the row with Hermione the previous night hadn't gone too much awry, thanks to Ginny who stepped in, making both Ron and Hermione look pretty ashamed. Apparently Harry had stormed off sometime during the argument, which Ginny reprimanded the two prefects about, making them feel even more guilty.

Ron sat up in bed and rubbed his eyes. He glanced over at Harry's bed and noticed it was untouched.

Ron frowned, but then shrugged as he began to get dressed.

He left the boys' dormitory a couple of minutes later, he spotted Ginny and Hermione coming down the stairs from the girls' dormitory.

"Hey," He said as they met halfway through the deserted common room. "Have you guys seen Harry?"

Hermione shook her head and Ginny said "No, we just woke up."

"His bed's untouched." Ron said with furrowed eyebrows." Seems like he didn't sleep there last night."

"Maybe he slept on a couch down here." Hermione suggested. They all looked around at the couches, and found that one was occupied by a sleeping student, only it wasn't Harry.

Lavender Brown lay sleeping peacefully on the couch, covered mostly by a blanket; apparently she had slept in her clothes.

"Just Lavender." Hermione sighed.

Ginny shrugged. "Maybe she knows where Harry is." She said as she made her way over to Lavender.

Hermione rolled her eyes, why would Lavender know where Harry was? If he had been sleeping in the common room and she knew about it, he probably hadn't told her when he left since she was still asleep.

"Lavender?" Ginny called as she gently shook the sleeping girl. Her eyes fluttered open.

"Oh, hi Ginny." She stretched and looked around. "Where's Harry?"

Hermione raised her eyebrows. "We were about to ask you the same thing."

Ron shrugged. "Seems like he didn't sleep here either."

"Oh, but he did." Lavender stated as she smiled slightly. "Well, he didn't really get that much sleep but…" She cut herself off and blushed as Ron, Hermione and Ginny all stared at her.

"I'm gonna go take a shower," She said as she got up from the couch and straightened her skirt. "Tell Harry 'hi' for me when you see him."

The others nodded as Lavender made her way towards the staircase. She stopped in mid-tracks however, and walked back to the couch and picked up some kind of white cloth from the floor. She blushed and quickly made her way towards the girls' dormitory.

Ginny's mouth hung open; she turned towards her brother and Hermione and held up a finger as she asked, "Did she just pick up her knickers from the floor?"

Ron and Hermione nodded dumbly.

"And…" Ginny went on. "She said Harry slept here last night."

The two nodded again.

"And she also said he didn't really 'sleep' last night?"

Another nod.

"So, if you put two and two together…" Ginny said, but stopped and looked at her two friends expectantly.

There was a short silence before Hermione spoke up. "I think we should go find Harry."

"Yeah." Ron and Ginny said at once.

They figured Harry might be down in the great hall for breakfast. However, they spotted Luna Lovegood turning a corner and walking towards them, staring dreamily into space.

"Hi Luna!" Ginny said as Luna looked up at them, seemingly surprised to see them.

"Hello." She said casually.

"Er…have you seen Harry?" Ron asked.

"Why, yes," Luna nodded. "I've seen him quite often this month actually."

"He means recently." Hermione said with a roll on her eyes.

"Oh yes, he's down in the kitchen," Luna said. "The house elves said he's been there all night."

"Thanks Luna!" Ginny said, but before they could head down to the kitchen, Luna continued speaking.

"He's also in the broom cupboard over there," She pointed towards a door some feet behind Hermione, "shagging Marietta Edgecombe."

The others stared quizzically from the broom cupboard to Luna who continued "I believe I also saw him down the corridor around the corner here," She said and looked around the corner she just rounded. "He was beating up Vincent Crabbe and George Goyle. He's also-"

Hermione cut her off. "Will you make up your mind?" She almost yelled.

"He can't be at all those places and doing all those things at the same time!" Ron said.

Luna nodded. "Yes he can," she stated matter-of-factly, "if there's seven of him that is."

Silence.

"What did you say?" Ginny asked, but quickly glanced towards the cupboard; she thought she heard some weird sound coming from it.

"That there are seven Harry Potters." Luna said with raised eyebrows.

Hermione was about to open her mouth and say something, but was cut off by the sound of an explosion. Seconds later Crabbe came flying from around the corner straight into the wall. Not long after that, a very angry looking Harry Potter rounded the corner, he was holding a whimpering Goyle by the neck and suddenly flung him with incredible force along the corridor, making him land about ten feet away from Ron, Hermione, Ginny and Luna.

Harry noticed his four friends standing there, watching him with wide eyes, and open mouths (excluding Luna).

"WHAT?" He retorted. Ron, Hermione and Ginny stumbled backwards at the tone of his voice.

"Hello Wrath." Luna greeted, smiling.

Wrath glared at her and muttered "Hi Luna."

Luna's face turned serious. "You really should control your temper."

"Mind your own –beep-ing business!" Wrath spat.

"You shouldn't be rude either." Luna said in that annoying 'matter of fact' voice of hers. "And you shouldn't swear."

Wrath growled and stepped up to her, hands outstretched as if to strangle her. Although he stopped and just glared at her, his hands itching to hurt her. He gritted his teeth before turning away from her, growling.

"DAMMIT!" He exclaimed. "God damn! Why does it have to be you? I can't –beep-ing hurt you!" He began kicking Crabbe who lay unconscious by the wall. "God dammit! Mother-beep-ing son of a –beep-! Get up so I can kick you down!" He scowled and turned towards the group and called at something behind them. "OI! Lust! Take care of her for me will ya?" He motioned towards Luna.

"I'm a little busy here!" Came a familiar voice from the broom cupboard. The voice sounded as if the owner was running a ten mile marathon. Everybody turned and stared at the door.

"God dammit!" Wrath began tearing his messy hair. "Who is it this time?"

"Uh…I'm not really sure…" Lust panted. "What was you're name again? Oh yeah…Marietta Edgecombe!" He shouted.

Wrath's eyes widened. "WHAT!" He shouted in disbelief. "You'd prefer the 'sneak' instead of Luna Lovegood?"

Lust chuckled. "Well, since I already did Lavender, Parvati, Susan, and…DID YOU SAY LUNA LOVEGOOD?" They began to hear loud moaning coming from Marietta, as Lust apparently quickened his pace. "Hold on!" He shouted. "I'm almost done, I'll be right out!"

Ginny turned towards Wrath, an angry look on her face. "What do you mean by 'take care of her'?" She asked. "Are you gonna sell Luna out to some bloody playboy?"

Wrath was too busy kicking Crabbe's unconscious body to notice her.

"Harry, are you listening?" Ginny exclaimed.

Wrath turned towards her with an angry look on his face. "Call me Wrath, okay?" Then he resumed his kicking.

"Wrath?" Ron frowned. "What the-"

Suddenly they heard an all too familiar voice from around the corner.

"Yep, that basilisk was a piece o' cake…" Said the voice, there were a lot of exciting murmuring around it. "I got a nasty bite in the arm though, but I easily healed it with some phoenix tears…." Suddenly the source of the voice showed up around the corner.

Hermione, Ron, and Ginny all gawked as Harry Potter (a.k.a. Pride) rounded the corner along with a group of excitingly whispering first years.

Pride stopped as he noticed Wrath standing there, kicking the still unconscious Crabbe.

He smiled brightly. "Ah, Wrath! Having fun I see?"

Wrath turned around and glared at Pride. The first years' eyes all widened as they saw his face. They looked from Wrath to Pride and back before turning around and quickly running away from them.

Pride scowled. "Now look what you've done!" He said exasperatedly. "You scared away my audience!"

Wrath rolled his eyes and kept kicking Crabbe, who of course, was still unconscious.

"Hello Pride," said Luna.

Pride looked at Luna and smiled. "Hey, Luna!" He greeted. "Here to listen to the stories about my greatest deeds, I presume?"

"I'm sorry, but no." Luna shook her head.

Suddenly the door to the broom cupboard opened and Ron, Hermione and Ginny's eyes went if possible even wider as the Harry known as Lust stumbled out, very out of breath. He adjusted his tie and grinned suggestively.

"Wrath you bugger." He said; his eyes traveling from Hermione to Ginny to Luna. "You only mentioned one beauty out here, but I see three."

Wrath snorted as he kept kicking the obviously unconscious Crabbe.

Suddenly Marietta Edgecombe stumbled out of the closet, her eyes grew wide (really, there's a lot of wide eyes here, don't ya think?) as she noticed there were three Harry Potters standing in front of her. She looked at the ceiling before falling to the floor with a thud, fainted.

"I'm gonna escort her to the hospital wing," Pride said as he walked over to her and hoisted her up in his arms. "Aren't I gallant?" He smiled before walking around the corner.

"Very." Lust nodded before turning his attention towards his friends.

"Ginny, Hermione, Luna," He nodded toward each girl in turn, not even acknowledging Ron. "You three look absolutely astonishing today!" Hermione and Ginny both looked down, blushing deeply. Luna just smiled.

"What the bloody hell is going on here?" Yelled a voice.

Everybody turned around to see Draco Malfoy coming towards them. He looked with his mouth agape at the unconscious Goyle in front of him. His eyes grew wide as they fell on Wrath who now stopped kicking at the (you'll never guess!) unconscious Crabbe.

Wrath grinned wickedly as he saw Malfoy. "I've been looking for you." He said as he cracked his knuckles, neck, back and arms.

Malfoy's face paled as Wrath began to quickly walk towards him. He turned on his heels, running as quickly as he could with Wrath at his tail, screaming "Get back here you –beep-ing son of a –beep-!"

Suddenly another Harry (known as Greed) came around the corner, he was panting heavily. "Oi, Wrath!" He shouted. "Wait up!" He made to run after Wrath and Malfoy, but stopped in mid tracks and ran up to Crabbe. He checked his pockets and pulled out some money.

"Only ten sickles!" He exclaimed and punched the (ta-da!) unconscious Crabbe. "Cheap bastard." He muttered before running over to Goyle and checking his pockets too.

"NO MONEY AT ALL?" He shouted in disbelief. "Why you-" He stood up and kicked Goyle a couple of times before running off in the direction Wrath and Malfoy took off into.

Greed left a pretty awkward silence in his wake, which Ron broke by throwing his arms in the air and scream "WHAT IN MERLIN'S BLOODY NAME IS GOING ON?"

Lust smiled and looked at Ron. "Hey Ron, I didn't see you over there." Which was weird, because Lust was standing right next to him. Lust turned to Luna and gently took her hand in his.

"Luna," He whispered softly. "I would be very delighted if you would give me the pleasure to go out with you."

Luna smiled shyly and looked up at him." I would love to," She said and tilted her head. "Friday?"

Before Lust could reply, Hermione spoke up. "We have to talk to professor Dumbledore about this!"

"Yes, something is seriously wrong here!" Ginny exclaimed.

Lust frowned. "I can't see anything that's wrong."

Ginny whirled around and stared at him. "So you're saying that the fact that there are four of you isn't a bad thing?"

Lust grinned. "You're cute when you're mad." Ginny was about to shout something about that comment. Fortunately, Lust was quick to get back on subject. "I wouldn't say that four is that bad," He scratched his chin thoughtfully. "Seven is more likely to be bad." He shrugged.

"Seven!" Ron exclaimed.

Luna nodded. "Yes, I told you, didn't I?"

"Of course you did." Lust grinned as he stroked Luna's cheek, making her blush slightly, although smiling all the same.

Hermione rolled her eyes. "Alright, let's go already!"

They all began walking quickly towards Dumbledore's office, except Luna, who stayed behind with Lust.

"Luna!" Ginny said, trying to make her hurry up.

"I'd rather stay here with Lust, if it's not a problem." Luna said and glanced at Ginny.

Lust grinned. "Call me Harry. "He said. "We can save 'lust' for later."

Luna smiled. "Alright, 'Harry'."

Ginny rolled her eyes in a very Hermione-ish way and grabbed Luna's arm and began pulling her away.

"You coming?" Ron called to Lust.

"Oh, I can't." He shook his head. "I have a detention with professor Tonks soon."

"Since when did she give you detention?" Ron frowned.

"Oh, she didn't," Lust grinned. "I just thought she might be in need of a little spanking, so I'll go to her office for 'detention'."

"Ah." Ron nodded in understanding as he turned to follow the rest of the group. It took him a couple of seconds however to understand what Harry said, although when he did, his eyes grew wide as quaffles.

"WHAT?" He yelled as he spun around. Lust, however, was gone.

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(A/N) Flametongue: First chapter done! I know, I made Tonks the new DADA teacher, I thought It'd be fun! I understand if people get confused about all the Harry's, but please, try to see the humor in it! Make me happy! Review!

(A/N) thekecmaster: I finally got around to fixing Chapters 1-6. There were only minor changes, nothing too major.


	2. Enter Sloth

(A/N) Flametongue: Apparently, you guys are finding this fic entertaining! Seems like most of you think I have a sick twisted sense of humor...but, come on! It's the Swedish way of comedy! And most of my 'female' readers seems to have taken quite the liking for Lust...hmmm...I wonder why...One reviewer (whom I won't name) actually said that she would 'SO go out with Lust'

I decided to update as soon as possible; why? Because an anonymous reviewer threatened to shove her keyboard up my -beep- if I didn't... (She's one of the girls who apparently licks her lips when thinking about Lust)

Some reviewers asked me 'how do you come up with this stuff?' and the answer is quite simple; I LOVE the seven deadly sins! Don't ask me why...so I just combined my love for sins (heheh) with the idea of more than one Harry...and as for how I come up with the humorous stuff, well, I'm a funny guy!

And to DestroyerDRT, this is not a Harry x Hermione fic, so I'm not really sure...Hermione is a bit to smart to be fooled by Lust's charm...

I took a seven deadly sins test earlier...hehe...anybody who can guess which sin I am get a cup of coffee!

(A/N) thekecmaster: I'll let you guess which one is mine. Answer after Chapter 8.

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Chapter 02 – Enter Sloth

Luckily, the gargoyle that usually stood in front of the staircase to the headmaster's office had already been moved, so the group of four quickly climbed the stairs and burst through the door to Dumbledore's office without even knocking.

"Professor Dumbledore!" Hermione exclaimed at once. "There's something wrong with Harry!"

"Yes, we have noticed." Dumbledore said with a twinkle in his eyes.

Hermione blushed as she noticed that Dumbledore wasn't alone in his office and she was afraid she'd interrupted something important. Apart from Dumbledore, the four heads of houses were also here. Professor McGonagall of Gryffindor was standing next to Dumbledore, Professor Flitwick of Ravenclaw stood on a chair on the other side of Dumbledore, Professor Sprout of Hufflepuff sat in a chair by one of the bookshelves, looking very concerned, and (Ron's and Ginny's noses wrinkled in disgust) Professor Snape of Slytherin was standing next to the door. Hermione nearly gasped when she noticed a very lazy looking Harry Potter sitting in a chair vertically from Dumbledore's desk, with a very concerned looking Dobby standing next to him.

"We were just about to interrogate this one when you four oh so gracefully burst in." Snape sneered as he motioned towards the lazy Harry.

Hermione blushed deeper.

Dumbledore smiled reassuringly at Hermione. "Apparently, this Harry goes by the name of Sloth."

The four students looked at said Harry.

"It sure fits him." Ron frowned. Dumbledore smiled.

"Professor," Hermione said, turning her attention back to Dumbledore. "From what I understand, Harry has been divided into seven different people, how?"

"It is all because of this." Dumbledore said and picked up a small black orb lying on his desk. "The muggle name for it would be 'the eye of Lucifer', although our kind would like to prefer to it as 'the eye of mischief'. Whoever touches it will be divided into seven people, each with a personality resembling one of the seven deadly sins."

Ron frowned at the sphere in Dumbledore's hand. "But you're touching it now, professor."

Dumbledore smiled. "Yes, but since Mr. Potter has already drained it of its power, it's quite harmless."

"But, where did Harry get it?" Ginny asked.

"Apparently Mr. Potter took a little stroll last night," Snape said. "And he happened to stumble upon one of Hogwarts' countless hidden treasures."

Dumbledore nodded. "Fortunately, Dobby here was with him, and so he was able to inform me immediately."

"SO WHY HAVEN'T YOU DONE ANYTHING ABOUT IT YET?" Ginny burst. She blushed when every head turned towards her.

Dumbledore however, smiled. "It took me quite some time to look up the information about the eye of mischief in any of my countless books," He said. "I figured it would be best to be well informed before we began to 'round up' all the Harry's."

"Well, you better do that quickly," Ron said and nodded his head. "I'll be surprised if there are any Slytherins left that Wrath hasn't beaten to pulps." He earned a quick glare from Snape after that statement.

"And it seems we are running out of virgins around here." Ginny said, again without being able to stop herself.

"Ginny!" Hermione hissed.

McGonagall blinked. "I beg you pardon, Miss Weasley?"

Dumbledore (what do you think he did!) smiled. "It seems that Lust has been on a prowl."

Professor Sprout looked rather alarmed as she turned to the four students. "He hasn't done anything…forceful, has he?"

Ron frowned. "Not that we know of."

"He's being quite the charmer though, mind you." Ginny said, she was having quite the problem to contain herself today.

Dumbledore (guess what!) smiled and shook his head at professor Sprout. "I do not believe that it is in Lust's nature to make any young women do anything against their will," He said with the usual twinkle in his eyes. "It takes the sport out of it, I should think."

"So how do we get Harry back into one piece?" Luna spoke up for the first time since they entered Dumbledore's office. "I'm going out with him on Friday, and it would be quite troublesome to bring seven of him to Hogsmeade."

Almost everybody stared at her with raised eyebrows, although she didn't seem to notice. Dumbledore had a (what did he have?) smile combined with his raised eyebrows in amusement; before he could answer though, a chuckle was heard. Everybody turned and stared at Sloth who had been sitting quietly in his chair until now.

He raised his eyebrows and looked at Luna out of the corner of his eyes. "Lust made you promise to go on a date with him?"

Luna looked at him. "I wouldn't say that he 'made me', but yes, I promised him a date."

Sloth chuckled; there was a cold tone in his voice that scared most of the people in the room. "I don't think you should get your hopes up," He said. "That's just Lust, if he's still here by Friday he'll probably have forgotten about you," He chuckled again. "And if you get old Harry back…well, I wouldn't expect too much out of that bloke if I were you."

Everyone stared at him. Dumbledore's smile had long since faded from his lips (finally!).

"So you're saying," Hermione spoke up, "that you lot is nothing like Harry?"

Sloth stared lazily at her; then he looked down and sighed. "We all have some part of Harry in us; we're using his body, after all." He looked up and smiled sadly. "But combined with our personalities, he's nothing like he usually is. Although we are mostly his inner sins, just enlarged. Just look at Wrath, he's beating up everybody Harry's always wanted to beat, and a couple of others. Pride is the part of him that he never shows, the arrogant one, no matter what ol' Snape says, Harry's not arrogant."

Everybody cast a glance at Snape, whose face was very stern.

"And if I know Gluttony right," Sloth chuckled (really, people are freaking me out!). "I wouldn't be surprised if he's raiding the kitchen of everything he never got to eat as a child."

Hermione and Ron both had similar thoughts: 'Damn those Dursleys!'

"What about Lust?" Luna asked in a slightly choked voice that was hardly noticed.

Sloth looked at her for a moment before speaking. "Well, since Harry hasn't really had any romantic moments in his life, Lust is trying to compensate for that by having as many girls as possible."

Dumbledore looked thoughtful. "What about Greed and Envy?"

"Envy is just an annoying prat who complains about everything that won't go his way," Sloth said. "Harry has always been one who never complains if he can avoid it, or just feel like it. Greed, well, he's not that hard to figure out; he wants everything Harry always wanted but never got, and much more. He's probably out there collecting money so he can buy a Valhallan death rune."

Hermione, Flitwick, McGonagall, and Sprout all gasped.

Ron frowned. "What's a…Valhallan death rune?"

"It's an old Viking rune stone, very, very rare," Hermione said as she looked back at him. "I heard there's only four left in the entire world."

Dumbledore nodded sadly. "True."

"Why would he want a death rune?" Ginny asked.

"The Valhallan death rune is an extraordinary artifact that has supreme power if used correctly," Snape said. "It is said that it could even bring back souls from the other side, and thus by recreating their bodies be given life anew."

Ron's and Ginny's mouths fell open.

"He wants to resurrect Sirius?" Ginny asked.

"Or his parents." Sloth said and leaned back in his chair. "Like I said; Greed wants everything that Harry never had, one of those things is parents."

"How would you know about the death stone?" Professor Sprout asked.

Sloth chuckled (again?). "Harry looked it up once a couple of months ago, in the Room of Requirement."

There was short silence, before Luna spoke up.

"What about you?" She asked, looking Sloth straight in the eye.

Sloth raised an eyebrow. "Me?"

"Yes," Luna said, never taking her eyes off of him. "Which part of Harry are you?"

Sloth sighed deeply, oh the bother of talking. "I'm the part of him that he wants to be, but never will be able to be." He paused a moment. "He wants to…'not care'. Everything about Voldemort (Sprout jumped, and Flitwick fell off his chair), his parents and Sirius' deaths, he wants to forget about it, he wants to be normal, but he know he can't, he has too much weight on his shoulders, wouldn't you agree, professor?" He looked at Dumbledore, who nodded slowly.

Everybody was quiet for a good two minutes.

"So," Hermione said. "How do we get Harry back into one piece?"

"First of all we need to get all of the 'sins' to be in one place." Dumbledore said. "We should all focus on that before going through the rest of the process."

Hermione nodded and Dumbledore smiled (Noooo! He's back!) reassuringly.

"Well, that won't be a problem, right?" Ron said and looked around at everybody in the room, his eyes landed on Sloth. "Will it?"

Sloth looked up, and then turned his gaze back to the ever so interesting floor. "You won't have too much trouble with Envy or Gluttony, their both pretty thick." He paused. "You might think that Pride would be an easy nut to crack, considering his arrogance, but he's not bragging over nothing. He's smart. Lust and Greed are both sly as foxes; you'll have some problem with tricking them." He stopped.

When he didn't continue, Dumbledore asked "And Wrath?"

"He's the basilisk in the phoenix nest," Sloth said. "If he suspects that you're trying to trick him, he'll go berserk. And believe me; he's scary when he's mad. He's all the anger Harry's kept bottled up for the last sixteen years."

Dumbledore nodded.

Sprout looked hesitant. "Is there a possibility that this will be…dangerous for the students?"

Sloth stared at her, he suddenly smiled. "Only with Greed and Wrath. Greed is manipulative and will break you down mentally; Wrath just breaks your bones."

"Why are you telling us this?" Snape asked suddenly. "Aren't you aware that if we succeed with pulling you all together, you will not be 'free' anymore?"

"Oh, I'm aware alright," Sloth shrugged. "I just don't care."

Dumbledore turned to the four students in front of him. "If you can avoid these matters, please do, but if you accidentally find any of Harry's sins except Greed and Wrath, try to lead them towards Professor McGonagall's classroom, since you are all friends of Harry's, I should think you'll have an easier time than anyone else."

They all nodded.

"Take Sloth with you, he may be better off in your hands." Dumbledore motioned for Sloth to follow them.

Sloth sighed and stood up

"Now, if you please excuse us," Dumbledore said.

They nodded again and left the office.

"Okay, what do we do?" Hermione asked when they had descended the staircase.

Ron shrugged. "Go back to the common room?" He suggested.

Ginny snapped her head in his direction. "What?" She said, disbelievingly. "We can't do that, we have to round up all the Harry's!"

"Dumbledore told us to avoid doing that unless we ran into any of them." Hermione said.

"Well, then we will simply have to make sure we do run into them then." Luna said in her annoying matter of fact tone.

"Precisely!" Ginny said, beaming at Luna.

Hermione looked hesitant.

"Alright," Ron sighed. "Where do we start?"

"Well," Ginny said and thought for a second before continuing. "Gluttony is down the kitchen, right?" She looked at Sloth for confirmation.

He shrugged. "Probably."

Ron held up a finger, a thoughtful look on his face. "Wait, I think…maybe we should check Tonks' office."

Hermione frowned. "Why would Gluttony be there?"

Ron shook his head. "Not Gluttony."

Ginny raised her eyebrows. "Then who…?" Her eyes widened in realization. She shook her head. "No, he wouldn't….would he?"

"Well, he did tell me he thought that she was in need of a 'spanking'." Ron said.

Hermione raised her eyebrows. "Lust is after Tonks?"

Ron nodded.

Hermione and Ginny looked at each other, and then they darted off in the direction of Tonks' office.

"Hey, wait up!" Ron yelled and quickly followed.

Luna sighed and grabbed the ever so lazy Sloth by the wrist and ran after them.

They ran into Tonks a little earlier than they had expected; she came around a corner and looked around furiously. She saw Ginny and Hermione come running towards her and quickly asked "Have you guys seen Harry?"

Ginny and Hermione looked at each other as Ron came to a stop next to them; had Lust gotten to her already? "Uhm…well…"

Before they could finish answering, Tonks saw Luna come dragging with Sloth.

"You!" She pointed at Sloth with a furious look on her face.

Sloth raised an eyebrow. "Me?"

"Don't you 'me' me!" Tonks paused for a second; musing about how the hell she'd been able to come up with such a confusing sentence.

"Uhm…Tonks?" Ginny dared to ask. "What did Harry….do?"

"He…he…he…" Tonks stammered, she stomped her foot and exclaimed "He spanked my butt!"

"Ah." Ginny nodded in understanding.

"And he didn't even let me spank him back before he disappeared!" Tonks continued furiously as she glared at Sloth.

Everybody raised their eyebrows at Tonks. Hermione shook her head and said "Uhm…Tonks…there's something you should know…"

"What?" Tonks asked impatiently.

"Aaah, there's my little Tonky!" Said a voice.

Tonks turned around and her face went white (literarily) as Lust walked down the corridor towards them.

"Hey there Sloth!" He waved.

Sloth just nodded lazily.

Tonks eyes were wide and her head turned back and forth furiously from Sloth to Lust. "What the hell is going on?" She asked.

"You've been a bad girl, that's what's been going on." Lust grinned and he winked at her when he reached her, making her blush. "You were supposed to follow me, but you got lost." Lust totted.

Tonks crossed her arms, trying to look bossy. "And what makes you think I wanted to run after you?"

Lust sighed and leaned closer to her. "Because you simply can't get enough of me." He closed the distance between them and planted his lips on hers.

Tonks eyes widened and she made to push him away, but strange enough she found her eyes close as her hands traveled up to the back of Lust's head to pull him closer.

Luna stared at the floor; the dreamy look on her face was replaced by a look of sadness.

As Ginny noticed Luna's sad face, she put a hand on her shoulder and whispered, "Don't worry, it's not the real him, remember?"

Luna looked up and smiled slightly.

Ginny smiled reassuringly.

Suddenly Tonks broke away from Lust. "We can't do this here." She stated before quickly grabbing Lust-Harry by the arm and dragged him to the nearest classroom. She kicked the door open and pulled him in as she quickly planted her lips on his. Lust closed the door behind them and there was clicking sound, telling people it was locked.

Hermione quickly walked over to the door and knocked. "Uhm…Tonks?" She called.

"GO AWAY!" was Tonks' reply.

Hermione quickly backed away from the door. She turned around and looked at the others.

Ginny closed her eyes and held up a finger. "I thought Lust was the one doing the seduction."

Sloth shook his head. "Never underestimate his charm, although it seems as 'Tonky' has been having some perverted dreams about her best student."

Ginny and Hermione wrinkled their noses in disgust.

"She didn't even stay around long enough for us to explain the situation." Ron frowned.

Suddenly there was an angry roar in a voice that could belong to none other than…

"Wrath!" Ginny gasped and began running in the direction of the noise.

Luna grabbed Sloth by the arm and quickly followed.

"Ginny! Luna!" Ron called to them. "Dumbledore told us to stay away from Wrath!"

They kept running nonetheless.

Hermione groaned. "Come on, someone might be in trouble." She said as she and Ron began running after them.

"Might be?" Ron said, eyes wide.

* * *

(A/N) Flametongue: second chapter; done.

Sorry if it wasn't too much humor in this chap...I'm saving it to the next chapter! -evil laugh-

HAH! I actually made a cliffhanger!

Now, would any of you guys please try to guess what sin I got in a seven deadly sins test? One character in this fic actually shows a bit of my personality...

REVIEW! Or feeeeel my wrath!...and my greed...and gluttony...oh, and my envy of others who gets reviews instead of me...and of course, my lustful NEED of reviews...IF YOU DON'T REVIEW, I'LL GO INTO SLOTH-MODE AND MAKE YOU WAIT A LOOOONG TIME FOR THE NEXT CHAP! Hag, I'm scary...and damn well PROUD of it!


	3. Enter an Ordinary Day

(A/N) Flametongue: Sorry for the delay guys, I've had a lot to do lately. I mean, there's two fics that I try to update regularly, this being one of them, and I also have two other fics that I HAVE to update soon!

Anyways, I LOVE MY REVIEWERS!

Some of you have actually been able to guess right about my sin; I'm Lust. When I took the test, I was surprised that I didn't get Sloth as a result, but well, it's gotta be the fact that I DO care what people think about me.

Some of you seem to think that I'm American, because of my writing-style. And I must say that you're quite wrong; I'm mostly Swedish, but also part-Scottish. Imagine that, eh?

A little zebra pointed out something about the name of Greed, and asked why I didn't name him 'Avarice', well, basically because I got the idea of the fact that I got the idea of the names from an anime called Full Metal Alchemist. I was planning on naming the sins with the Latin names, but I changed my mind. I had another idea of using their names in Swedish, but I realized that 'Greed' is so much better for a name than 'Girighet'.

By the way, Synthea alalk, what's wrong with Harry/Tonks?

* * *

Chapter 03 – Enter an Ordinary day

Ginny rounded a corner just in time to see Warrington, the Slytherin Quidditch team's new captain, being lunged into a wall by an obviously angry Wrath.

Luna and Sloth caught up with Ginny, and they all noticed that Neville was there too, for some reason he was trying to calm Wrath down.

"No Harry, it's alright, yo-you don't have to-" Neville was cut off.

"'Alright' my –beep-!" Wrath exclaimed as he lifted Warrington up by the throat and pushed him against the wall. "Nobody insults my friends!"

Ron and Hermione just caught up with the others as Ron stared directly at Wrath beating Warrington's head against the wall. His dream had come true, a Slytherin Quidditch player getting his head smashed.

"Neville, are you alright?" Hermione panted as she noticed him standing there.

"Yeah, I…" Neville suddenly noticed Sloth standing next to Luna. He looked from Sloth to Wrath and back again, he repeated this movement before asking, "Why are there two of Harry?"

"Long story." Ginny said.

Luna sighed and walked up to Wrath and just as he pulled his arm back for a punch, Luna grabbed it and said, "Wrath, I have told you over and over that you should control your temper."

"Listen to her, Potter!" Warrington pleaded. "Listen to Loony!"

Wrath squeezed his hand around Warrington's throat. "What did you call her?" He hissed.

Warrington tried to gulp, but it's quite hard to gulp when you can't even breathe. "Isn't that her name?" He managed to ask, weakly.

That was the last drop, the very last drop that made Wrath lose control…I mean really lose control. He spun Warrington around and flung him into the opposite wall with such force that it actually cracked.

Everybody stared with wide eyes as Warrington's unconscious body fell to the floor.

Luna sighed and looked at Wrath with a scolding look on her face.

"What!" He snapped. "He called you Loony!"

"I am well aware of that." Luna said calmly. "But I usually don't care about what people call me."

"So you're saying you wouldn't mind even if people called you a little –beep-?" Wrath exclaimed.

Luna shrugged. "It depends who it is," She said. "I don't think I would mind you calling me your little –beep-."

Everyone's eyes widened as they stared at Luna, shocked by her statement.

Wrath began hitting his head against the wall, clearly annoyed.

"In fact," Luna said, crossing her arms. "I believe you might be in need of a little spanking."

Wrath whirled around and glared at her. "I'd like to see you try." He challenged.

"I don't think it would be a problem," Luna said with a shrug. "Since you seem to be reluctant to hurt me."

"What makes you think that?" Wrath asked dangerously.

Luna raised her eyebrows. "You're welcome to show me if you can hurt me."

"Luna!" Ginny hissed, panic in her voice.

"It's alright," Luna said and turned to look at Ginny. "He won't hurt me," She turned back towards Wrath. "Will you?" She asked.

Wrath glared at her, his teeth showing. Luna had a look on her face that no one had ever seen her with before, it was a look that not even Wrath could resist, and it was…the puppy-dog eyes.

"GAH!" Wrath growled before turning back towards the wall and started hitting his head against it again. Luna smiled happily before giving him a firm spank on the butt.

Wrath growled even louder and backed away from the wall before running headfirst into it, as if he wanted to run straight through it; then again, nobody would be surprised if he succeeded.

Suddenly they heard voices coming from around the corner.

"No Michael, I told you; it's OVER!" yelled a voice.

"Hey! Get back here! I'm not done with you!" yelled another voice.

Suddenly Cho Chang came around the corner with her angry boyfriend Michael Corner right at her tail. Michael grabbed Cho by the arm and spun her around to face him.

"Look at me!" He shouted and shook her by the shoulders.

"Let go of me!" Cho demanded.

Wrath looked at the two of them for a second, and then he pulled out a piece of parchment from his pocket and scanned it with his eyes. He smirked and called out "Hey Cho!"

Cho and Michael looked at him.

"Step away from him, will you?" Wrath said.

"I'm not done talking with her!" Michael yelled at him.

Suddenly a Harry that looked very sly came around the corner; Greed. He grabbed Cho by the arm and led her over to where the others where standing. "Better do as he says." He said.

Michael and Cho stared at Greed with mouths open (I trust I don't have to explain why).

"You're lucky, Corner." Wrath said coolly and took out his wand. "You're on the list."

Michael's eyes widened in horror as Wrath lifted his wand and sent some kind of fireball at him, burning most of his clothes, and hair. The fire was short-lived though; when Corner hit the wall the only evidence of fire on him was his burned clothes.

"God dammit Wrath!" Greed exclaimed and tore his hair. "I can't sell his robes if they're burned!"

Wrath rolled his eyes as he walked over to Michael who was still lying on the floor, whimpering. "Just take Warrington's stuff!" Wrath called to Greed before he began kicking Michael in the gut. "He's right behind you!"

Greed whirled around and grinned as his eyes fell on Warrington. "Ah, great!" He exclaimed and proceeded to mug the unconscious Slytherin. "Warrington has always been a rich boy….hmmm nice watch." He said thoughtfully.

At this point, Cho snapped. "Alright, what's going on?" She asked, her head speeding back and forth from Harry to Harry. "Why is Harry beating up my ex-boyfriend? Why is he mugging Warrington? And why is he standing over there at the same time? Why is he standing at three different spots at the same time?" She was firing questions at 50 miles per hour.

"Cho, Cho calm down." Ginny soothed and walked up to Cho who kept babbling about hysterically. "CHO!" Ginny shouted and grabbed her by the shoulders. "Calm. Down." She said slowly as Cho nodded her head.

Hermione turned to Neville. "What happened earlier?" She asked.

Neville tore his eyes away from where Wrath was beating up Michael who was pleading for mercy. "Warrington said something about me being a weed nerd," Neville said, "when Harry heard that he began beating him up." He paused for a second, looking at the three Harry's that were currently present. "What exactly is going on?"

Ginny sighed. "Harry's been divided into seven different persons," She said. "All of them has a personality of a deadly sin."

Cho blinked. "How did that happen?"

And so they began their little tale about what Dumbledore told them about the eye of mischief, and how they had to round up all the sins and put them all in the same place so they could get them back into one person.

For a moment there was silence, but then Neville spoke up. "I'll help."

"Me too." Cho said at once. "After all, I owe Harry for beating up Michael just now." She smiled and turned around to look at the spot where Wrath was supposedly kicking Michael's arse, although the only thing she could see was her ex-boyfriend lying unconscious on the floor; Wrath was gone. "Where did he go?"

Ron turned around and looked at Michael. "Dammit, He's gone!"

"Huh?" Greed looked up from his position next to the now broke Warrington. "Aww, not again!" He groaned as he quickly got to his feet and ran around the corner shouting "Wrath! Wait up!"

Hermione groaned. "There they go again."

"Should we follow them?" Cho asked.

"What's the rush?" Said a voice.

Everybody whirled around to come face to face with Lust. He had a somewhat smug smile on his face.

Ginny crossed her arms. "Where is Tonks?" She asked.

"She's taking a nap." Lust said with a shrug. "She's pretty wild, so I guess she got a little worn out." His eyes suddenly fell on the limp shape of Michael Corner. "Is that Michael Corner?"

"Yeah," Cho said and looked over at her unconscious ex-boyfriend. "Serves him well, the groping git."

Lust gave her a charming smile. "I have to agree with you on that," He said. "He kept me from seeing you."

Cho blushed while Ginny and Hermione both rolled their eyes.

"You look very beautiful when you blush." Lust said as he brushed away a strand of hair that fell into Cho's face.

She smiled shyly and said "Thanks."

"If you two are done flirting," Ginny snapped. "let's head down to the kitchen!"

Lust grinned and raised his eyebrows at her. "Jealous?"

"As if!" Ginny spat.

"Let's go." Hermione said exasperatedly.

Ginny and Cho both grabbed a very smug-looking Lust by the arms as they all made their way down to the kitchen.

"What exactly are the….deadly sins?" Neville asked nervously after a while.

"The seven deadly sins are basically seven bad attitudes," Hermione said. "Sloth over there is the sin of apathy and indifference," She motioned towards Sloth who was lazily being dragged by Luna. ""Wrath is the sin of anger, Greed is the sin of…greed, Envy is the sin of jealousy, Pride is the sin of arrogance,"

"Gluttony is the hungry bloke, right?" Ron said as they reached the portrait hole leading to the kitchen, he proceeded with tickling the pear.

"And Lust is the horny bugger." Ginny muttered and looked around. "Where is he by the way?"

Everybody looked at her and then around the corridor; Lust was gone, and what's more, Cho was too.

"That horny bugger!" Ginny exclaimed.

Sloth raised and eyebrow. "You mean you didn't notice them leave?"

Ginny whirled around and stared at him. "You saw them?"

Sloth shrugged. Ginny groaned.

Hermione sighed. "We'll catch them later." She said before walking through the portrait hole into the kitchen, followed by Ron and Neville. Luna shrugged and dragged Sloth with her into the kitchen. Ginny groaned again before following them.

The kitchen was a funny sight; house elves were running around frantically with huge smiles on their faces, each of them carrying a trail of food.

In the middle of the kitchen, by one of the tables, sat four overweight Hufflepuffs, having an eating contest with the one and…not really only Harry Potter.

"Could we have some more apple pie here?" He called to the house elves that were running back and forth between the table and the ovens.

"At once, sir!" Exclaimed a very happy looking house elf.

"Gluttony, I assume?" Hermione asked as they all came up to the five contestants.

"Yup!" Gluttony responded through a mouthful of chicken. "Have a seat, I'm running out of competition!"

They all looked at the four Hufflepuffs; they looked like they were about to burst from all the food they had supposedly eaten.

"How the hell can you –burp- eat so much without getting full?" One of them demanded, glaring at Gluttony who just shrugged and kept eating.

Ginny frowned. "How much have you been eating?" She asked.

An elf answered as he put a plate of pies in front of Gluttony who happily dug in. "Mr. Gluttony has been here eating all night, Miss!"

Everybody's eyes went wide (excluding Luna and Sloth).

"How the bloody hell have you been able to keep eating without bursting!" Ron demanded.

Gluttony shrugged.

Sloth sighed. "Gluttony's special power is that he has somehow a bottomless stomach," He said. "he can eat how much he want, which is a lot, without getting full, or fat."

The four Hufflepuffs at the table looked at Sloth, then at Gluttony, then back at Sloth again, before their eyes darted back to Gluttony, and after that to Sloth, then they landed at Gluttony before they all passed out from both the shock, and their overfull stomachs.

Hermione looked at Sloth. "Special power?" She frowned. "Do you all have special powers?"

"Yup." Sloth said simply.

"WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL US EARLIER?" Hermione shrieked with a volume that was somewhat exaggerated.

Everybody checked their ears to make sure they were unharmed, except Sloth who just shrugged and said "No one asked."

Hermione closed her eyes as she breathed slowly, counting to ten, trying to calm herself. "What powers do you and the others have?"

Sloth sighed heavily; there were so many words he had to use. "Wrath has a somewhat inhuman strength, along with the knowledge of some very destructive spells." He said. "Lust has a very, very, very good stamina, considering he will have great use of it in his lustful antics."

Everybody wrinkled their noses in disgust, except Neville who just looked confused, and Luna who had blissful smile on her dreamy face after thinking about what Lust must use his stamina for.

"Pride has what you would call super-senses; his four senses are twenty times as strong as a normal human's, which gives him cat-like reflexes, almost dog-like sense of smell, he can find a single whispering voice out of a screaming crowd, taste something by just sticking his tongue out in the air-"

"Wait," Ginny interrupted with a nervous look on her face. "If he can hear that well, wouldn't he be able to hear what we talked to Dumbledore about?"

"Well, the thing about Pride is that he only listens for people talking about him, he turns a deaf ear towards everything else, unless they're talking to him."

Ginny sighed in relief.

"What about Greed?" Hermione asked. "What kind of power does he have?"

"He's an illusionist, he's using some sort of hypnosis to make you see things," Sloth said. "I'd advice you to not look him in the eyes. He also has a very high intelligence; he could master a spell within minutes when it would normally take years to learn it. Envy is the only one of us who doesn't have any powers, which gives him another reason to be jealous at the others."

"And you?" Hermione prodded.

Sloth shrugged. "I have quite the blessing, I don't feel pain, I don't get hungry, and I don't get tired."

Ron frowned. "How can you look so lazy and not be tired?"

Another shrug. "I just sleep for the sake of it; I usually don't have anything better to do."

"Well, anyways," Ginny said. "Come on Gluttony, we're going to McGonagall's classroom."

"Aww, but I'm not finished!" Gluttony whined.

Ginny gave him a threatening glare.

"Okay I'm coming!" He said quickly and scampered to his feet.

The house elves all had disappointed looks on their faces. Gluttony smiled at them. "Don't worry guys, I promise that when I get hungry, you'll be the first to know!"

The elves all smiled and bowed deeply.

Hermione rolled her eyes and grabbed Gluttony by the arm and dragged him out of the kitchen, the others hurrying along after them.

* * *

(A/N) Flametongue: Sorry if there are some errors, but I didn't have time to check the spelling more than once. Please review!

(A/N) thekecmaster: I hope the errors disappeared now. I don't own Harry Potter.


	4. Enter Lightsabers

(A/N) Flametongue: I am so very sorry for making you all wait this long, but, y'see, I've had a lot to deal with...

I just spent the afternoon writing this chap so it's pretty short...from now on, the story will be labled AU since the sixth book has been released...my comment of the book you ask? I HATE SNAPE! Enough said.

(A/N) thekecmaster: I changed a few lines to meet story submission guidelines. I understand why Snape did it.

* * *

Chapter 04 – Enter Lightsabers

Dean Thomas was having a good day; a very good day indeed. Gryffindor were favorites of winning the Quidditch House Cup, his grades were all decent, he and Seamus had managed to hex a bunch of big-mouthed Slytherins without getting detention, and last night he had successfully asked Ginny out to Hogsmeade this weekend. Yup, it was all good and dandy. It was when he turned a corner on his way to breakfast however that his day turned out to be more awkward than good.

One can easily state that he was greatly surprised when Professor Flitwick came soaring through the air and knocked him to the ground.

Dean groaned as he heaved himself off the floor, pulling Flitwick up with him as he did so.

"Professor, are you alright?" He asked worriedly as the tiny professor coughed slightly.

"Yes," Flitwick said. "Worried, you need not be, Mr. Thomas." His voice was raspy, and his skill for putting words together seemed to be a little off. Very unlike Flitwick's usually squeaky and intelligent voice.

"Er…professor….your voice…" Dean said as he looked down at his charms professor's frowning face. For some reason, Flitwick's way of speaking sounded familiar to the young muggle-born.

"Hmm…a charm from him, it must have been." Flitwick stated and sent a determined look down the corridor.

Dean looked up, and for the first time he noticed someone standing at the end of the corridor; wand in hand and a furious look on his face.

"Get out of the way, Dean!" Wrath barked.

"Harry?" Dean asked and stared at his dorm-mate with a confused look on his face. "What're you-"

"Harry, he is not," Flitwick stated as he took a step forward. "Wrath, his name is."

"Don't make me curse you!" Wrath shouted at Dean.

Dean's eyes widened and he held his hands up defensively. "Hey whoa!" He protested. "Don't do anything that could damage my face, I got a date with Ginny this Friday and-"

"A date with Ginny?" Wrath questioned as a manically wicked grin crept across his face. "I can think of a big pack of Weasley brothers who'd be grateful if I beat the living daylight out of you!"

"Come on mate, it's-"

"Your fight, this is not." Flitwick said and took another step forward, his eyes fixed on Wrath.

"Eh?" Dean raised an eyebrow.

"Professor Flitwick." Wrath said conversationally as he lowered his wand and took a determined step forward.

"Wrath Potter." Flitwick said as he took an equally determined step forward.

"You have meddled in my business for the last time." Said Wrath and in a swift movement swished his wand and sent a vase that stood nearby flying at Flitwick. After a quick swish and a flick from the charms master's own wand the vase stood securely by the wall next to him. Wrath did another levitation charms and sent a, no doubt horrified suit of armour flying at his opponent. The armour screamed in a terrified voice but sighed with relief as it too was placed down safely by the swift little wizard called Filius Flitwick.

Flitwick sighed. "Strong you have become, Wrath, the dark side I sense in you."

Dean at this point feared for his sanity, but these actions and Flitwick's strange way of speaking was somehow reminding him of a movie he saw this summer.

"I have become more powerful than any wizard," Wrath spoke as if he had learned these lines by heart, as if he'd read them from a manuscript, "even you." Wrath pointed his wand and sent some sort of blue lightning towards the old little charms master. Dean quickly stumbled backwards, but with speed that seemed impossible for such a puny man, Flitwick had raised his wand and somehow absorbed the lightning in a blue orb at the tip of his wand before Dean had even taken two steps to safety. He thrust forward with his wand and sent the bolt back towards Wrath who quickly deflected it and sent another one back, this time Flitwick absorbed it completely without sending it back.

"Much to learn, you still have." He stated.

Wrath smirked. "I think it's obvious that this duel won't be decided by our knowledge of spells, but by our skills with the wands."

Dean frowned, weren't they already using wands? He got his answer quickly though, as Wrath held his wand like a sword, and sure enough, a red beam came out of it and stopped in mid-air, giving it the impression of a lightsaber.

Flitwick held his wand pointed and the same thing happened to it that had happened to Wrath's.

'This is seriously starting to freak me out!' Dean thought as tiny professor Flitwick lunged towards Wrath with something that resembled a battle cry. He was jumping ridiculously high into the air and spinning around while swinging his blade-equipped wand, attacking and blocking Wrath's moves.

Dean had by now conjured a bucket of popcorn and was staring at the fight intently. He finally remembered the science-fiction movie he saw this summer, but still could not believe that the action before him was really happening.

Suddenly Flitwick and Wrath crossed their wands/sabers and glared at each other.

"Fought well, you have," Flitwick said, "my young student."

"This is just the beginning." Wrath stated, and in a surprising move, he swished his hand and made every suit of armour in the corridor fly towards Dean, without even using his wand.

There were several screams of 'help' and 'save me' from the armours and a very girlish scream from Dean as the helpless suits flew towards their unfortunate goal. Flitwick quickly turned around, extinguished the saber and with much difficulty stopped all the armours in mid-air, right in front of Dean. The armours all let out sighs of relief, but screamed shortly as they all landed in a heap on the floor.

Flitwick turned around and saw to his disappointment that Wrath had escaped. He sighed and walked back to Dean who looked as if he might have wet himself.

"How feel you?" Flitwick asked kindly.

"I'm-" Dean began to say, but was interrupted by the charms master's quiet exclamation of "Bollocks! Annoying, this voice is." He pointed his wand towards his throat and waved it around a couple of times before saying "Testing, testing. One two three…" He coughed a little. "Dore mi fa so la ti…"

Dean watched the professor with a slightly disturbed look on his face.

"Ah, much better!" Flitwick said, his voice back to its squeaky octave. "Now, Mr. Thomas, I think it would be best if you went back to what you were doing." And with that the tiny man turned around and hurried along the corridor after Wrath.

Dean did as he was told and continued on towards the great hall, musing about what the bleeding hell Flitwick had meant by 'the dark side' during his duel with Wrath. Perhaps he too, had seen Star Wars.

There was a lot of commotion in the entrance hall when Sloth and co. arrived there. It appeared as if Snape was trying to capture one of the sins, namely Pride.

He laughed as he dodged yet another hex from Snape with ease. "Come on Snivellus," He taunted, "You can do better than that!"

Snape sneered as he sent hex, after curse, after jinx at Pride. This soon began to bore Pride, but he quickly made the duel more enjoyable (for him, that is) as he practically skipped towards Snape, avoiding stunners as he did so, and sent a roundhouse kick straight at Snape's jaw and sent him tumble through the closed doors of the Great Hall which now flung open violently.

The Slytherin table stared in shock as their head of house landed rather ungracefully on the hard floor. The Ravenclaw table was host to many curious looks as the smart-brained students all quickly tried to come up with the most logical explanation to this occurrence. At the Hufflepuff table every single occupant asked each other why the potions professor was lying on the floor. Everybody at the Gryffindor table just beamed.

"Pride, that's enough!" Hermione scolded as she made her way towards him. "You might hurt…" But before she was able to finish, someone zoomed past her and into the great hall. Apparently the sight of four big tables full of food was too much for Gluttony to resist.

"Not so fast, Potter!" Snape, who had gotten back onto his feet, sneered at Gluttony and grabbed him by the arm, his greasy hair was disheveled, giving him the look of a mad scientist. "You'll pay for that."

Gluttony frowned. "That wasn't me." He said. He jerked his head out towards the entrance hall. "It was Pride.

"That may be, but you're still a Potter, so you will be coming with me!" Snape said sharply and made to drag Gluttony out of the hall. Bad move.

Snape shrieked like a Banshee as Gluttony began to gnaw rather viciously at his arm. Never stand between a glutton and his food.

The Gryffindors all cheered and called out encouragements to Gluttony. Ron, Hermione, Ginny and Neville all watched in shock as Snape tried desperately to shake Gluttony off of him. Ginny suddenly shook her head violently to get herself out of her daze and waved her wand, closing the doors to the great hall and saying, "We can come back for Gluttony later."

And with that, the four friends, plus Luna and Sloth, headed of to pursue Pride, who in some mysterious way, had disappeared.

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(A/N) Flametongue: See? Told you it was short...I'll try to get the next chap up quicker...and before you say anything; yes, I am aware that Episode II: Attack of the clones wasn't on screen in 1996 (which happens to be the year when Harry starts his sixth year) but come on, this is AU!

Now, be good little readers and review!

(A/N) thekecmaster: If there are any other problems, let me know and I'll think of something to fix it.


	5. Enter the Plan

(A/N) thekecmaster: I don't own the Harry Potter Series. I am hoping to finish this story in a similar vein as Flametongue, but let's see how that goes.

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Chapter 05 – Enter The Plan

Ginny led the group of 6 (Ron, Hermione, Ginny, Neville, Luna, and Sloth) all over the castle, finally stopping in front of Moaning Myrtle's Bathroom. They did not find any hint of Pride, nor any of the other Potter sins. She suddenly asked, "How are we supposed to capture all 7 Potters in the same room?"

Luna replied, "Isn't there a map of some sort, that allows one to see everyone in the castle?"

Hermione replied, "Yes! The Marauder's Map! But who has it?"

"Didn't Harry have it when he found the orb?" inquired Ron.

"Then someone must have it now," piped Neville.

Dobby looked at The Marauder's Map, and noticed that the seven split Potters all appeared on the map. As soon as he noticed that, an idea struck him. He scanned the map and noticed Ron, Hermione, Ginny, Neville, Luna, and Sloth all stop in front of Moaning Myrtle's Bathroom. Taking the map, he disappeared from the kitchen and reappeared right in front of them.

"Hi there," squeaked Dobby.

"Dobby, do you know where the Marauder's Map is?" asked Luna

"I do, Miss Luna, but I don't know how to operate it."

"It's quite simple, Dobby. If I tell you how to operate it, would you like to help us bring back Harry?"

At this point, Ron and Hermione exchanged glances in total shock, Ginny and Neville both simultaneously said "Huh?", and Sloth yawned. Dobby looked over at Luna's pleading eyes, and nodded.

"Good. To turn off the map, just say 'Mischief Managed.' To turn it on, say 'I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good.'"

Hermione recovered from her shock sufficiently to ask, "How do you know how to operate the map?"

Luna replied, "It's quite simple. I saw Harry late one night turn on the map, and heard the words he spoke. He caught up with me and explained the history behind the map over hot chocolate. It was quite fascinating really, his descriptions and motions, how his arms…"

Luna's eyes began to glaze over, and she was about to describe Harry in more detail than the others needed to know, when Ginny broke Luna's reverie, and asked, "How do we get them all together in the same place?"

"I could write some letters to them," suggested Neville, who did not want to actively search some of the Potter sins out.

"What if I transfigured some objects into parchment messages?", asked Ginny.

Luna asked Sloth if he had any ideas to get his 6 sinful alter-egos in the same room with him.

Sloth sighed, this could take many sentences. "Get each sin into the room a minute within each other. Have Envy get there first, so that he will be pacified and not complain so much about us. Get the Creevey boys into McGonagall's room, and have Pride tell them stories. Have some house elves bring unlimited food into the room to get Gluttony. See if you can enlist Fleur or Cho or Tonks to get Lust in there. Bring lots of leprechaun gold to draw Greed. Finally, draw Wrath in by putting a statue of Voldemort.

Ron exclaimed, "Wait! That's only 6 sins! What about you?"

Luna calmly answered, "I can always lead Sloth by the hand in. He doesn't mind."

Sloth just shrugged; he supposed it was less work to just shrug and agree than say something and possibly disagree.

"How are you not excited that Luna's holding your hand?"

Hermione, quick on the lightning response, buzzed, "Weren't you listening earlier? Sloth doesn't feel anything. Luna, why don't you kiss him, and we'll demonstrate."

Luna wasn't going to complain – she kissed him right on the lips before anyone could say anything. Hermione then asked Sloth if he felt anything. He said, "No."

Hermione then said, "Now observe." She kissed Ron on the lips, and Ron and Hermione stayed close kissing for a minute. Ginny was wide-eyed at the display, but Neville put a hand on her hand to calm her down. Then, Ginny, Neville, and Luna looked at each other and laughed, which finally broke apart the two.

"Did you feel that Ron?" asked Neville.

"Hermione is awesome!"

"Thank you Ron, so are you."

"Hermione, you are…"

"Okay Ron, save the lovey dovey stuff for another time. I still want Harry back."

Luna was pretty sad and upset at this point; she wanted the true Harry Potter to say the words she wanted to hear. Sloth realized that this was not a time to be lazy, nor did he want to see Luna cry. "Don't worry Luna. You are immune to each of his sins. Not even Wrath will hurt you, so you must hold something special in his heart."

Hermione recovered from shock at Sloth speaking without prompting to chip in, "See Luna. Even Sloth is not totally immune to you."

Normally, even in a school this large, one would normally find it hard to exit the school. However, with 6 of the 7 Harry Potter sins running amok and everyone else preoccupied with capturing or fleeing the deadly sins, no one noticed Malfoy, Crabbe, and Goyle running out the front door of the school. As they ran, they caught enough snippets of the action around them. They ran to the gates and disapparated to Voldemort's new headquarters at Malfoy Manor.

Voldemort, who was trying to think of a plan to lure Harry away, casually flicked 3 Crucio curses at the young Slytherin trio. "What's so important that you have to disturb my thinking!"

"Harry Potter has been divided into seven different persons, my Lord."

Voldemort exclaimed, "That's the dumbest thing I have ever heard! Crucio!"

Snape strode into the room, "The Malfoy kid is not lying – Potter is in 7 forms, my Lord. The entire castle is in chaos!"

"Hmmm." Voldemort lifted the three pain curses and then called for Lucius, Bellatrix, Rodolphus, Dolohov, MacNair, Crabbe Sr., and Goyle Sr.

"Listen up minions! Hogwarts Castle is in chaos. We are going in, and taking the 7 Harry Potters with us. Kill off anyone in the way, but leave the Potters for me. I will not have 7 archnemeses unite against me. Let's go!"

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(A/N): thekecmaster: Please review, I'd really appreciate it.


	6. Enter Voldemort and the Death Eaters

(A/N) thekecmaster: I don't own the Harry Potter Series. I am hoping to finish this story in a similar vein as Flametongue, but let's see how that goes. I turned on AutoCorrect for the ampersand symbols – there should be no more &'s appearing in the story.

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Chapter 06 – Enter Voldemort and the Death Eaters

Envy was having a tough go of it so far; it seemed like everything he wanted to do, say, or act was done by someone else in the last several hours. He wanted to eat the fresh treacle tart produced in the kitchens a few hours ago. However, Gluttony managed to finish all of the pieces, and the house-elves were too busy with other food to cater to his wishes. He wanted to ask out Luna Lovegood, but Pride bragged that Lust beat him to the task. Not only that, but Lust was playing physically with as many of the attractive women in Hogwarts that he could find and leaving them too physically spent to do anything. Envy definitely was jealous of Wrath for beating up his nemeses as well as Greed for robbing from the rich. Pride was taking all of his admirers away, so he had no one to talk to, not even the Creevey brothers. When he saw Sloth leave a line of vision with a hand held by a feminine hand, he ran off. Envy prepared to yell at Sloth and demand to know how Sloth got a female to hold his hand when he's not even trying to get a female. However, as soon as he saw the owner of the feminine hand as Luna Lovegood, the original tirade at Sloth died before leaving his mouth, as he attempted to balance his expressions in the presence of the eccentric Ravenclaw.

Luna noticed Envy's changing looks on his face, and asked, "What's wrong?"

"Luna, the other guys all have special powers that I don't have, and they're doing things that I want to do before I can do them."

"Well, I'm working on a special project. Would you like to be the first one to help me?"

"Am I really going to be the first one to help you Luna?"

"Sure. I would like you to go to Professor McGonagall's classroom at 4PM. I'll explain it all when I get there."

"I'll be there Luna!" With that, Envy walked off, giddy in achieving something before the other Sins did.

Luna immediately turned to the fish faces of Neville, Ginny, Ron, and Hermione, as well as the blank face of Sloth, before commenting, "One down, six to go."

With that, Luna led Sloth and the other 4 friends to find the other Sins one by one.

Envy ran down to the kitchen and found that the house-elves finally acquired enough ingredients to make some more treacle tart. The house-elves took a few minutes, and Envy was about to eat a treacle tart when all hell broke loose.

An explosion was heard in degrees varying by distance to the explosion. It seems like Voldemort and several of his death eaters had entered the castle, using the secret entrance through the basement of Honeydukes as suggested by Wormtail, but one stupid lackey blew up the statue of the one-eyed witch, permanently revealing the secret entrance to Hogwarts.

"Goyle! You were not supposed to blow up statue!"

"You couldn't open yourself, Crabbe!"

"Quiet you morons!" yelled the irate Lucius Malfoy. "Do you want the entire school to know that The Dark Lord is here?"

Unfortunately for Voldemort, a Hufflepuff near the area recognized "Dark Lord" as Voldemort. Then, he took off shouting to his classmates, "YOU-KNOW-WHO IS IN HOGWARTS! RUUUUUNNNN!"

Of course, screaming Voldemort's alias was akin to screaming fire in a movie theater; most people, ghosts, and portrait dwellers ran one way or the other in trying to find exits or hiding places.

Voldemort caught up to the rest of his lackeys and saw the fleeing chaos.

"Damnit, Crucio!" cursed Voldemort at Lucius Malfoy, Crabbe Sr., and Goyle Sr. "I want to eliminate Harry Potter – all seven of him. This was supposed to be a silent operation, you loud nincompoops!"

Dolohov thought Voldemort was being at least as loud as Lucius, if not louder. However, he did not enjoy receiving pain, so he stayed silent.

One person who definitely heard Voldemort's exchange was Pride Potter. He immediately found Lust in the nearby classroom finishing quality time with Katie Bell. Pride and Lust ran over to a spot near the location that used to hold the one-eyed witch in order to ascertain what was going on.

Voldemort was barking orders now, not caring at this point if he was loud – for the bungling lead trio of Lucius Malfoy, Crabbe Sr., and Goyle Sr. put some members of the castle on high alert – and the last thing he needed was Dumbledore knowing about the quick invasion.

"All right, it's time to look for Potter…"

At this point, Pride jumped out of his hiding spot, shouting, "Looking for me, Voldemort? Or should I call you Riddle?"

Voldemort turned, a bit in shock, and then suppressed the shock as he addressed the guest. "Harry Potter."

"Call me Pride." As soon as Pride said this, Lust jumped out and said, "Call me Lust."

Bellatrix Lestrange's eyes began to glaze over – she clearly experienced no good physical activities in at least ten years, when a loud shout from ahead broke things up quickly.

"Get them!"

Curses were aimed at the two altered Potters, but they were not at their original surprise spots at the beginning of this confrontation. Lust and Pride had turned tail to run, with Pride shouting back, "You can't hit a hot dog bun!"

Lust commented, "It's time to split, fellow deadly sin."

Pride replied, "Only I can hear you over all this din."

Lust ran off in the direction of the astronomy tower, chased by the Lestranges, while Pride taunted MacNair and Dolohov as he raced to the Slytherin hallways.

Back at the corner where Lust and Pride split, Voldemort was shouting instructions, occasionally with flying spit.

"I'll be on the 7th floor. Snape, distract Dumbledore. Crabbe, Goyle, go to the kitchen. Malfoy, go to the Great Hall. Bring me back each Potter you can find, or expect a kick to each behind."

Once word had spread that You-Know-Who was in the castle, the Great Hall descended into chaos, as nearly every person stormed out to hide or escape. The only exceptions were Greed and Gluttony. Gluttony saw the massive exodus as an opportunity to eat the rest of the food there unscathed, while Greed was busy looking for dropped money and other valuable items. Gluttony sat down at the Gryffindor table, and summoned all the food to him. It took him about half an hour, but he finally finished off the remaining food, which was enough to fill at least a hundred people.

Gluttony then said, "See you later Greed, I'm off to the kitchens."

Greed replied, "Again? You just ate enough food to feed a small army!"

"Yeah, but, I'm still hungry." With that, Gluttony bounded for the kitchens and Greed rolled his eyes.

Five minutes later, Malfoy reached the Great hall. He expected to find hordes of students to scare, but instead, a potential target was the only person in the room.

"Harry Potter. You will not escape this time."

"Lucius Malfoy. You have a lot of money. I am going to take all of your money."

"I don't think so, Potter." Lucius spoke as he sent a mild rope curse at Greed.

"Call me Greed, Lucius," who promptly dodged and returned fire.

Lucius and Greed fought in the Great Hall. Unbeknownst to both combatants, Wrath entered the Great Hall from one of the side doors. As soon as he spied Lucius, he shouted, "Lucius Malfoy! You're next!"

Just as Lucius was about to end the one-on-one fight with Greed, Wrath sent a Reducto curse right at Lucius, who could only get his hand up in time. As a result, only his hand broke, but Lucius was in terrible agony as he fell from the intense pain from Wrath's destructive spell. He made a motion to grab his wand with his left hand, but Greed had recovered and stupefied him to end the spellfight.

"Thanks Wrath. I'll rob Lucius first, then you can beat him up," said Greed.

Wrath countered, "All right, but hurry up!"

Greed proceeds to raid the Lucius Malfoy pockets, searching for money and expensive items.

Meanwhile, in another dimension within Hogwarts…

Crabbe Senior and Goyle Senior ran down into the kitchen, hoping to capture a Potter, grab some free food, or do both. Once in the kitchen, Envy confronts them.

"What the hell are you guys doing here?"

Crabbe Sr. and Goyle Sr. looked at each other. Goyle lost the staring contest and spoke out, "We're here to capture Harry Potter. And that looks like you."

"Ah, but I'm not Harry Potter."

Goyle Sr. was really confused; wasn't he supposed to catch Harry Potter? Crabbe Sr. thought the same thing, and asked, "But you look like him – scar, glasses, hair…"

Envy replied, "Oh, Harry Potter is unavailable at the moment. Now go away, don't bother me."

Goyle Sr. and Crabbe Sr. saw the treacle tart near Envy, and both opted to make a dash for it. Fortunately for Envy, Gluttony just arrived and also made a dash for the tart, which resulted in a three-way fight to see who could challenge for the tart. Envy looked at the three, ate the tart, and then left the kitchen.

Lust ran all the way, never breaking stride on his way to the Astronomy Tower. As he made the turn, Ron, Hermione, Ginny, Neville, Luna, and Sloth all saw Lust running and were about to ponder why when Bellatrix turned the corner and ran up after Lust. Luna, Sloth, and Neville led a charge, though for different reasons: Sloth because Luna was still holding him, Neville because he wanted to capture Bellatrix, and Luna because he wanted to talk to Lust.

Rodolphus, who is a bit slower than his wife, was a bit further behind and crashed into Luna, Sloth, and Neville as he tried to turn the corner. Luna and Neville were knocked down, but Sloth managed to stay on his feet, blocking the stairway. Rodolphus did not recognize the other two characters, but he did recognize a Potter when he saw one, and immediately sent a pain curse at him. The curse connected, but nothing happened as all Sloth did was yawn for the entire minute. Rodolphus tried another pain curse, and Sloth just stood there, motionless, apparently unaffected by the second curse. Rodolphus, after a second minute of unsuccessful pain distribution, sent a third curse at Sloth, but he just shrugged as the curse touched him without doing anything for another minute. Neville took the opportunity to stun Rodolphus and send all sort of binding curses to make sure he didn't get away.

Ron then said, "I think we should go rescue Lust from Bellatrix Lestrange now."

At this point, Lust came out of the Astronomy Tower with a slight grin, and said, "There's no need to do so," as he gently moved Sloth out of the way at the bottom of the stairs.

Neville asked, "Why not? What happened to Bellatrix?"

Lust replied, "She's all tied up at the moment." Neville didn't believe him, so he ran up the tower to check on Bellatrix. When he came back down, he brought the bound Bellatrix Lestrange, apparently smiling and sleeping.

Ron's eyes jumped out of his head as he asked, "How'd you tie her up?"

Lust just grinned, replying, "There are some things that you're not meant to know."

The facial expressions that appeared after this comment varied from disgust on Ron and Hermione, to puzzlement on Ginny, and Neville, to boredom on Sloth, to dreaminess on Luna.

Lust spotted Luna's dreamy look, and asked her what she was doing.

Luna replied, "I'm working on a special project in preparation for our date Friday. Would you like to help me?"

Lust grinned, "Why wait for Friday? We can go out today."

Luna replied, "I would love to, but I have to look for some Nargles and Wrackspurts first today. Could you meet me in Professor McGonagall's classroom at 4:06PM today.

Lust grinned, "Sure thing, Luna."

At this point, Hannah Abbott happened to be conversing with Susan about her activities with Lust. Hannah saw Lust, and called out to join her. Lust took off, and caught up with Hannah. They started talking and disappeared around that corner.

Luna looked sad again, as Lust didn't seem to be paying special attention to her as he did to the other females he ran across today. It was Hermione's turn to comfort Luna this time.

"Don't worry Luna, he's not himself."

"I know he's not himself, but it's hard to watch him run off and charm other girls."

"Well, he's not treating you like a one-time fling. He actually still remembers Friday's date, and when we restore him, he won't be such a womanizer."

Ron turned on Hermione sharply, "And just what do you know about womanizing?"

Hermione saw that Luna was sufficiently back to her special self, so she rounded on Ron entirely, "I read a lot Ron, unlike you. I only know what I read from books – or that used to be my only knowledge until Lust started his hunts."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah!"

Ginny stepped in, "That's enough – stop bickering like a married couple."

With that, they went off to find Pride, Wrath, Gluttony, and Greed.

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(A/N): thekecmaster: Please review, I'd really appreciate it.


	7. Enter Fun Time

(A/N) thekecmaster: I don't own the Harry Potter series nor any of the characters.

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Chapter 07 – Enter Fun Time

Gluttony was in a chaotic fight with Crabbe Sr. and Goyle Sr. Food and utensils were being tossed everywhere. The few kitchen elves who tried to break up the fight got knocked out and stayed down for the count. The rest had all dived for cover. After attempting to duel the dumb eaters with toasted breadsticks, Gluttony finally grabbed a pan filled with food and hurled it at his two adversaries. As the two adversaries tried to clear their eyes of food, Gluttony whacked both of them on the top of the head, finally knocking them out. The house elves in the kitchen first informed Gluttony that there was no more food left for the moment, and that he would have to return later. After Gluttony left, the house elves quickly bound the two death eaters and shrunk them. Then, they placed the dumb eaters in a little hamster cage, where the dumb eaters were stuck on a wheel chasing food. After magically sealing the cage, they took the cage to Professor McGonagall, who placed the cage on her desk and then ran off to find the headmaster.

Meanwhile, Gluttony walked away and walked straight into the good version of The Harry Potter Capture Unit. Gluttony immediately asked Luna if she had any food. Thinking quickly, Luna replied, "There will be some food in Professor McGonagall's room at 4:02PM."

Gluttony replied, "Awesome. Do you want to join me? I'll share some of my food with you."

Luna replied, smiling, "I'll be there, don't worry."

With that, Gluttony skipped off, trying to busy himself or find more food until the appointed time of food with Luna in Prof. McGonagall's classroom.

Ron asked, "Why did you agree to eat with him?"

Luna replied, "I have no problem joining up with Harry or any of his sins. However, I never actually said that I would eat with him."

Ron countered, "But you said…"

Hermione whacked him on the top of the head, "Ron, pay attention. She said she will be there. She never said she would eat with him."

Ginny turned to Luna and commented, "You do realize that Gluttony would eat you out of house and home, right?"

Luna smiled at the thought of sharing a house with Harry, and said "He might, but not if we restore Harry back. Then Harry and I can do other things in addition to eating together."

Hermione glared at Luna immediately and asked, "And just what do you plan to do to Harry?"

Luna smiled and replied, "That is one of the things you cannot look up in a book you took; it is also one of those rare things you are not meant to know."

With that, Luna dragged Sloth by the wrist and everyone else followed. Sloth just shrugged at being dragged along; he couldn't really think of anything else to do, and breaking Luna's grip would take unnecessary physical energy.

* * *

Pride still danced and moved gracefully around as he taunted MacNair and Dolohov. He led them back up the stairs to the Great Hall, where he ended up right smack in-between the death eaters.

Pride yelled, "I have you now! Surrender and I will go easy on you."

MacNair shouted, "Surrender??"

Dolohov countered, "Never!"

As they shouted, the two death eaters looked around Pride and right at each other. The two death eaters tried to institute the quick silent count. Unfortunately for them, Pride saw Dolohov mutter a mouthless "3-Count." After the third mouth movement, he quickly jumped into the air. When Dolohov and MacNair both fired on the silent "Three", Pride was already in the air. Each death eater's spell hit the other, and they knocked each other out.

At that point, Gluttony ran into Pride. Pride and Gluttony then compared stories of their recent death eater encounters. As the argument over whose story was better raised in volume level, Pride then asked Gluttony when was the last time he ate. At the mention of food, Gluttony ran off, looking for some more food to eat.

Meanwhile, Pride decided to search the castle for the Creevey boys or anyone else willing to hear some more tales of Potters vs. the Rotters, as he decided to call them.

Insert break line here

Luna dragged Sloth all the way to the 3rd floor, with Ron, Hermione, Ginny, and Neville in some pursuit. She had an idea, and did not want to stop pursuit until she reached her target. She had noticed Greed stalking off to the trophy room, possibly to count up his wealth.

Luna threw open the doors to the trophy room, dropping Sloth's hand to rush to Greed. Sloth fell down from the imbalanced position he was left in and decided to stay down. This, of course, caused quite a stir. The other four Harry Potter seekers were caught moving so fast, everything was a blur. They did not see Sloth down on the floor – they all tripped over him. Down on the ground, they did not want to run anymore.

Greed was quite disturbed that he was being interrupted while he tried to count what he had, and he thought of what he would do when he hypnotized the intruder. The problem was the intruder, for it was Luna Lovegood, not just the only non-Harry person he did not want to hypnotize, but also the only one he knew that saw things for what they are.

Luna strode up to him and asked him if he wanted to drink some felix felicis potion and win a few muggle lotteries. Greed made the quick connection between muggle lotteries and money, and his eyes lit up pretty quickly. Luna used the opportunity to tell him to go to Professor McGonagall's room at 4:05PM, when the lucky potion would be ready.

After Greed left, Neville asked Luna, "What's a lottery?"

Luna replied, "It's basically a gambling game. People buy tickets, trying to guess the numbers that will be drawn. Whoever gets all the numbers right wins a lot of money."

Ron countered, "Why are you trying to help Greed?"

Ginny asked Hermione, "Could you please smack my brother?"

Hermione replied, "Gladly." _Whap!_

"What was that for?"

"Use your brain, Ron! That was so Luna could get Greed into the room later!"

"Oh. Right."

Luna stated, "I think I have to find both Pride and Wrath myself."

Ginny, "Why?"

"Because if all of you come with me, they may be tougher to draw into the Professor's room."

Neville asked, "But how will we get back to Gryffindor Tower safely?"

Luna replied, "Dobby will take you all back."

At the mention of his name, Dobby appeared.

"Dobby has some news for you, Miss Luna. You have 4 visitors awaiting you on the 5th floor broken bathroom."

"I see. Could you take the group back to Gyrffindor tower safely, including Sloth?"

"No problem, Miss Luna."

Everyone followed Dobby's lead to the door, except Sloth, who was still lying on the ground. This time, he looked like he was sleeping.

Luna walked up to Sloth and said, "You know Sloth, if you don't go with them, I'm going to start tickling you to keep you awake."

With a speed rivaling the Road Runner, Sloth jumped up and ran to Dobby's group. He may be immune to pain, but he was definitely not immune to tickling, and he did not want to fight off a tickling attack. Luna called out to Sloth, "Stay with them, and follow their orders, or else."

Then, Luna lent Dobby the Marauder's Map. "Use this as a guide. Avoid any of the other sins and any of the teachers. Then come back to me with the map. I'll use the DA coin to alert them as to when you'll fetch them."

With that, Dobby lead Sloth, Ron, Hermione, Ginny, and Neville back to Gryffindor Tower. After a few minutes, Luna disillusioned herself and took off for Moaning Myrtle's Bathroom.

Voldemort was pretty angry; it was already 2:50PM and still none of his death minions showed up. He decided to take a walk around the castle and rescue anyone on his side who was down for the count.

He first took a lateral move to the base of the Astronomy Tower, where he found Rodolphus and Bellatrix, both bound and gagged. While Rodolphus was knocked out in shock, Bellatrix was sleeping with a smile on her face. Voldemort quickly unbound and ungagged the two. Rodolphus and Bellatrix told their tales of what had happened, with total shock appearing on the men's faces as Bellatrix described what had happened between her and Lust.

Rodolphus tried to initiate some small talk, but Voldemort was way too angry to let him finish.

"We are here to kill Harry Potter, not engage him in any other activity!"

Bellatrix looked a bit sheepish, but nonetheless followed Rodolphus and Voldemort after getting promises from her husband that some fun time would be coming after the mission.

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(A/N) thekecmaster: I'll post updates on my profile. Thank you for taking the time out of your day to read this chapter.


	8. Enter Padma & the Reinforcements

(A/N) thekecmaster: I don't own Harry Potter, Yoda, or Droopy. See Profile for more comments/updates.

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Chapter 08 – Enter Padma and The Reinforcements

Luna got to Moaning Myrtle's Bathroom, and recognized the familiar faces of Colin Creevey, Dennis Creevey, Remus Lupin, Fred Weasley, and George Weasley. She ended the self-disillusionment as she entered the bathroom.

"We heard there is chaos here, and we came to help, especially since our benefactor and adopted brother Harry Potter is in danger. But what exactly happened?"

Luna sighed, and told an abbreviated version of what has been happening over the last day and a half to Lupin and the Weasley twins. She told them about how Harry Potter was divided into seven sins, how each of them is causing their own individual brand of chaos, how the Death Eaters are inside trying to capture them, how her and Harry's other close friends are trying to restore Harry Potter, etc. She did get somewhat sidetracked as she described his motions, the downs (the non-feeling kiss with Sloth, Lust running off to seduce other girls, the massive eating frenzies of Gluttony), and the ups (the tickling threats, the Wrath spank, and the thought of sharing a house with Harry), but Lupin and the two pairs of brothers were able to either calm her down from her worst nightmares or gently steer her away from her best dreams and fantasies by reminding her that she can still bring back Harry together in one piece.

Luna then detailed her plan to bring him back together, including telling the Creeveys that she wanted them to search out Pride and get him into the room at 4:03PM to tell stories about Potter's adventures, which they readily agreed to do.

"Can we take more pictures of him as he speaks?"

"Why not, this will be good for the album/yearbook later," replied Luna

Fred and George asked, "You took pictures of Pride already?"

Colin replied, "Not just of Pride, but of all the 7 sins!"

Luna smiled and thought, "Maybe this deadly sin attack wasn't so bad after all."

At this point, Remus Lupin congraulates Luna for coming up with a great plan to restore Harry Potter to his original self. He then stated that, to protect Harry, one must think like a Marauder, for trouble will find him no matter where he goes.

Dennis and Colin then realized that Remus Lupin was one of the original Marauders, and they spent a few minutes congratulating him and taking pictures.

Dennis and Colin next asked Luna, "That's all great for the plan to bring Harry back, but how are you going to protect Harry from all the people who want to chase him after restoration for either romantic or violent purposes?"

Luna replied, "Don't worry, the plan is pretty simple. Here's what needs to be done…"

After conversing with Luna, Dennis and Colin set off to find Pride. They found him on the 4th floor, talking to the same first year students that got scared off when seeing Wrath earlier.

"Hi Pride."

"Dennis and Colin, two of my favorite listeners. I have some more stories for you."

Colin answered, "That's great. We have to do some homework and get our cameras, but would you like to meet us in Professor McGonagall's Room at 4:01PM?"

Pride answered, "Sure thing, I'll be there on the dot."

After Dennis and Colin left, Pride resumed telling the first year students about the basilisk and the Chamber of Secrets. "You see, the basilisk was over 600 feet long…"

Voldemort, Rodolphus, and Bellatrix went to the Great Hall. Instead of seeing hordes and hordes of fallen students, they saw Lucius Malfoy with his body somewhat mangled but clearly beaten to a pulp. After Voldemort restored Lucius's broken bones, they set off, looking for someone to beat or kill.

For nearly half an hour, the only two people they found were MacNair and Dolohov, which got Voldemort even angrier ("How the heck did you two lose to 1/7th of Harry Potter??"). After some more body searching, they found two hamsters in Professor McGonagall's Room, but since no one else was currently in the classroom, Voldemort was able to restore Crabbe and Goyle to their normal selves with no opposition.

"Master, we found out something important while in hamster form."

"Some people have been charged with bringing all 7 Harry Potters into this room."

"Well, if they're going to be here, we should be here to welcome them," Voldemort replied. "You six, stay here, disillusioned or in hiding spots. Ignore the calling of the Dark Mark. Do not reveal yourselves until I return with more enforcement, they are all here, and I give the signal."

Crabbe replied, "What if they are all here before you return?"

Goyle added, "Do we attack them then?"

"Crucio!" Voldemort screamed as he raised his voice angrily. "Do you not understand what I just said? Hide and do nothing until I give the signal, which will be a double tap of the dark mark. Is that understood?"

All 6 others, including the two dumbest eaters, replied, "Yes, master."

With that, Voldemort portkeyed out to get some more help. All 6 death eaters disillusioned themselves while picking spots to station themselves.

He arrived back at the Riddle Manor, where he promptly activated the Dark Mark. Rookwood, Jugson, Avery, Nott, Amycus, Alecto, and Narcissa all apparated to Riddle Manor. Voldemort repeated to them that they had to quietly sneak into McGonagall's room before 4PM. The group of 8 evildoers apparated back to Hogsmeade and then snuck back to McGonagall's room using the secret passage near the destroyed one-eyed witch.

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Meanwhile, Lupin had left to find Professor Dumbledore, and the Weasley twins left to harass Ron and Hermione. Luna was roaming the hall, looking to slow down the Harry Potter sins…and have fun doing so. She walked around a bend and found Wrath chasing Michael Corner and Greed dueling Padma Patil. Luna stops and notices a mirror sticking out of Padma's bag. Miss Lovegood took the mirror and stepped in front of Padma just as Greed tried to throw another illusion spell at Padma. This time, the illusion spell hits the mirror and flies straight back to Greed, who falls down as two Knuts fly out of his pocket. Luna jumped into the air to grab the Knuts and then asked Padma if they were hers. Padma denied losing the two Knuts in the heat of battle, so Luna pocketed the coins and walked over to the fallen sinner. She bound Greed hand and foot, and then levitated him to the nearest classroom. Padma was curious as to what was happening, so she followed the two schoolmates into the classroom.

Luna put the bound Greed on her lap and started tickling him for five minutes. While tickling Greed, Luna chastised this sin for trying to rob Padma out of her money. Padma raised her eyebrows, as she was somewhat a little surprised that Luna was tickling Greed and somewhat more surprised that Greed wasn't trying all that hard to get out of his bound state.

Greed cried out, "But I saw Padma doing stuff with Lust earlier."

Luna replied, "Padma is just as innocent as anyone else."

Padma thought, "I am never telling Luna what I did with Lust."

"Besides, Lust is charming nearly every attractive girl in the castle."

Padma said quietly, "I don't know whether to be flattered that you think I'm attractive, scared that you think I'm attractive, or horrified that you know I did something with Lust!"

Luna turned to Padma and said, "You are attractive, but my main focus is Harry. Once Harry is restored, I'll be taking good care of him." Luna then returned her attention to Greed, who was still trying to get out.

"But Padma has lots of money!"

"That does not matter, Greed. No stealing money from other people."

"But I need money to make that large purchase I am seeking."

Luna replied, "I won't let you go until you swear not to steal anymore money from anyone else."

After about five more minutes of tickling, in which Greed also called his captor Mistress Luna, Miss Mistletoe, and other attempts at endearing or submission terms, she finally relented and sat him down on a chair, releasing his ropes.

Luna replied, "I'm sure an intelligent boy like you can think of other ways to get money."

Greed replied, "I know! I can sell birthday suit photos of Cho that I have. Thanks Luna!" Greed kissed Luna on the cheek, and then ran off, shouting, "See you in 40 minutes!"

Padma recovers from the mind-reading episode earlier and asked, "Was that really necessary?"

Luna replied, "Was it necessary for me to tie Greed up and tickle him to stop stealing? No. I stopped him earlier without doing so. But I tied and tickled him because I like to do so."

An amused Padma then asked, "How come then you didn't stop Greed from selling pictures that contain all of Cho's details?"

Luna turned to Padma and then spoke in an even voice, "First, Cho isn't the most intelligent girl in the world – if you're going to expose yourself, don't do it in front of an uncontrolled camera. That's how many magazines get their money – selling photos of celebrities that people want to see."

Padma replied, "And lots of boys want to see Cho without clothes."

Luna beamed. She said, "Precisely. Second, she accused Harry of loving Hermione when everyone in the whole world with two former exceptions knows that Hermione and Ron are madly in love with each other."

Padma replied, "You know, I often wonder if they're secretly married. They argue a lot just like married couples do in the movies and real life."

Luna said, "Thankfully, they've seen the light, although Ron still gets whacked upside the head every now and then. Anywho, Cho also tried to get back with Harry later after the Department of Mysteries attack, being totally insensitive to the fact that Sirius just died and he was not ready to be in any relationship whatsoever. Finally, it's because she's the ringleader of stealing my stuff as the high and haughty princess. This might knock the luster off Cho a bit."

At this point, Blaise Zabini runs right by the two Ravenclaws, followed in hot pursuit by Wrath.

"Hey Wrath!", Luna shouts.

Wrath, who was running at full speed, skids to a screeching halt and allows Luna to come up next to him.

"Come now, Wrath. Why are you chasing Blaise?"

"He said something massively untrue – that I am your slave and that you won't let me fight!"

"Now now Wrath, that's not necessarily true. You just need to control your temper. You'll do better if you control your temper. Walk with me & I'll prove it."

Padma follows Luna and Wrath from a distance, trying to see what Luna has up her sleeves.

They walk across the 6th floor corridor and come upon Envy Potter losing a spellfight to the young Mr. Malfoy and his dumb eater friends, Crabbe and Goyle.

"I want to run forward and deck them for taking out my brother!"

Luna cast a deflecting spell to protect Envy from any more hits, and then she cast another silent spell at the trio of junior death eaters. Then, she placed her hand on Wraths's arm and said, "Relax. Just hide and watch."

Luna disillusioned Wrath, and then she boldly walked up to the three Slytherins and calmly asked what they were doing.

Malfoy beckoned Goyle, who replied, "We're beating up Harry Potter."

"Why?"

Crabbe shot out, "Because he beat us up savagely earlier and we want revenge."

"Why?"

Malfoy fired out, "He should not be allowed to beat us up and get away with it."

"But what if someone is protecting Harry and about to beat you up?"

Malfoy laughed, "Who's going to beat us up?" He looked around before seeing no one but Luna in front of him. "You are a stupid stick!"

All three Slytherins fell to the ground laughing. They were so busy laughing that they did not notice Luna walking calmly up to Malfoy until she was face to face with the overconfident bigmouth. As soon as she pressed her nose into his, he stopped laughing as Luna calmly said, "You know what? That makes me mad."

She then punched him right smack in the face, and Malfoy was sent flying towards a suit of armor that Luna managed to remove out of his way. Malfoy hit the wall and then fell down.

Crabbe and Goyle weren't very smart, and they looked at each other before deciding to take her down. Luna punched both of them in the stomach, sending them flying to the wall next to Malfoy. Then, she walked up to the three of them and swung the fallen enemies in circles before flinging them to the nearest room, where they landed each perfectly on a chair, but knocked out cold.

Luna then ran back to disillusion Wrath and said, "You see. If you control your anger instead of yelling and shouting like a maniac, you can deliver surprising results."

Wrath looked at Luna with a newfound respect and kissed her a few times on each cheek. "Do you know any other fighting strategies and tactics?"

I do, but I have to get some helpers and some dummies first. Do you think you could meet me in Professor McGonagall's room in half an hour?

Sure, "But you're going to have to help me."

Luna smiled and replied, "Trust me Wrath, I will."

Blaise reappeared on the scene, but he never noticed Wrath sneak up behind him and slam him down to the ground. Luna noticed and said, "Much to learn, hasn't he, Padma?"

Padma replied, "Yes, Luna, but how did you get so strong as to send the Slytherin pricks to the bricks?"

"Well, my tricks were casting strong lightening charms on them, and then distracting them with something ludicrous. I obviously couldn't beat them up normally, but if you tried to pick them up now, they each feel as light as a tennis ball."

With that, Padma Patil gawked at Luna as the younger Ravenclaw started walking back towards Gryffindor Tower.


End file.
